<<<<<The Sixth Day of Christmas
But really, I've been eating so much snow my urethra turned into a slushee machine. Seriously folks, I'm so cold--"
"Oh, I'm dreaming of un blanco Navidad!" sang a spicy voice. "Just like lost ones I used to know!"
It was Hugo Chavez, the former president of the beautiful country of Venezuela. He was singing to himself as he pranced through the lush green valleys of Venezuela; a Christmas tradition in South America.
"What a perfecto day to be alive! Even the jungle snakes have taken a day off from hunting the native koalas! It es un day of peace and happiness!"
Just then the Azuzfeld theme song started to play from Hugo's pocket.
"Oh es my alarm day nuevo Carl Azuz! He must be up to something new and exciting!" Hugo pulled his phone out of his pocket and opened the official Carl Azuz app. "Hmmmm..." said Hugo Chavez as he scratched his barbilla. "According to this latest update a storm of peanuts is brewing over the North Pole! As a respected leader de el globo I cannot let the spirit of navidad be ruined by cacahuetes falling from los sky!"
Hugo then closed the Carl Azuz app and opened up Isis, his voice-controlled phone A.I.
"Hola Isis. Send un text message to my dear amigo, Fidel Castro."
"Whatever you say, infidel," responded Isis.
"Dear Fidel, I am taking a short trip to el Polo Norte. I am leaving you in charge of el government de Venezuela while I'm gone. Please don't try to take full control of it again. And it is net el dia de April Fools this tiempa so you do not have an excuse."
"Sending message now, infidel."
"Gracias Isis," said Hugo. "Now call my personal pilot and tell him to bring the jeto privato to me. Looks like we're going to have a blanco navidad after all!"
The Eighth Day of Christmas>>>>>
Note: All characters and events on this website, even those based on and inspired by real people, places, or other's work, are entirely fictional, parodic, and satirical. They do not represent the views of the authors or readers.
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